I’m just going to get straight to the point here, grandparents rights are something I am completely against. The idea of a grandparent having to turn to the law to access their grandchild just doesn’t sit well with me. I am not discrediting the invaluable role grandparents have in helping to raising their grandchildren. I couldn’t have done it without my mum, step-dad and grandparents.
As parents, we have the right to control who has contact with our children. More often than not, a parent does not remove someone from theirs or their children’s lives without good reason. Sometimes involving toxic people in yours and your child’s lives can do more harm than good.
Just this year I made one of the hardest decisions of my life. I walked away from my relationship with my father and stepmother. My children adored them both, but due to a difficult past, and one too many incidents of violence, I had to turn my back for good. That decision was mine entirely. Other than their daddy, no one else on this earth has the right to decide who should be involved in their upbringing. It was not a decision that was taken lightly and I don’t think I’ll ever fully get over it.
The idea that they could apply for a contact order based on what is essentially just DNA fills me with dread. I spoke out about my troubles with my father, but what about those who don’t?
I hate to sound cliché, but mothers know best. We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. Some people don’t talk about past experiences. They simply take steps to ensure that their child does not go through what they did. Nobody need know why that decision has been made, it should simply be accepted.
My mother is an amazing grandmother who adores Mia and Theo. But she doesn’t have a right to my children just because she gave birth to me. She is given the right to be part of their lives by me, because of the positive influence she is. As a grandmother, she gets to savour every moment spent with her grandchildren, but she does not get to undermine me.
Essentially that’s all grandparents rights are, a desperate attempt to undermine parents. I hope and pray that this does not become ‘a thing’, and if it does, I may seriously consider immigrating.
Where does it end? In my eyes, grandparents have the same rights as aunties, uncles, cousins and great grandparents. Their involvement in a child’s life is solely down to what parents feel is best for their child. No contact order, no so-called grandparents rights, should undermine a parents wishes.